Hello everyone!
What do we "deserve?" The dictionary definition of "deserve" goes like this:
To earn by service; to be worthy of (something due, either good or evil); to merit; to be entitled to; as, the laborer deserves his wages; a work of value deserves praise. To serve; to treat; to benefit. To be worthy of recompense; -- usually with ill or with well.
Many times clients tell me that they "deserve" something; to be treated better by their partner, to have a better life, to have more money, etc. I recently asked a client why they felt that they deserved what they were asking me to help them obtain. I only asked the question because I am hearing a LOT lately about what people think they deserve!
I have clients tell me, "I was a good mother to my children, now I deserve some happiness in my life." Now this one always give me cause to pause. If you decided to have children, shouldn't you be a good mother?? Does being a good mother cause you to "deserve" some sort of reward for that? Or is being a good mother part of the idea of having children? Are the children the reward? Do you deserve "more" because you were a good mother? Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying one does or does not deserve something because of being a good mother. I am actually asking you, my readers, to weigh in on this!
Another thing I hear is, "I was a good wife to my husband. He left me anyway and now I deserve something better." So again, I feel like, well, if you are going to be a wife, should you not be a good one? Does your being a good wife mean you now deserve something better?
Then there is the, "I am a good person, I deserve good things in my life." Okay... so you are a decent human being. Shouldn't you be? Really, isn't it up to all of us to be, at the very least, a decent human being? Should there be a decent human being award? Now if by being a good person you mean you do works of charity, help the homeless and poor, and give freely of your time to the assistance of others, then, yes, maybe there is a merit badge for that! Maybe you are more "deserving" than someone who doesn't do those things. But if you are just sitting around, living your life, minding your own business, and not harming anyone else, I am not sure that means you "deserve" more than another "good person" who happens to be starving to death in Africa.
By the beginning of the definition of "deserve" above, to "earn by service" who amongst us is "deserving?" Should we be "earning" what we "deserve?" How do we earn it? I didn't say I had answers to these questions, maybe I just have questions! ;-)
I do know that it is really starting to make me uneasy how many people lately are telling me what they deserve. When I ask them why, they generally get pissed off at me, so I am thinking that is probably not the best approach. :-) But I am truly curious about the sense of entitlement some people seem to have; like the world owes them something: The mother who was good to her children (so was raising the children so horrible that she now deserves a reward for it?); the spouse who was good, etc. Because we went through tough times, does that mean we are now somehow entitled to a reward? Was our "tough time" worse than someone else's? IS there a reward for tough times?
I DO get that we are all filled with books and talk shows and self-help gurus telling us how to feel good about our own self-worth, how to manifest our destiny, how to think positively about ourselves and our goals. But does that mean we necessarily "deserve" them OR are we in some way supposed to earn that which we think we deserve?
Now, most of you are working on spell work from us, and we here at Spellmaker always want you to reach your goal! Most of my thought process above does not come from me thinking that you don't "deserve" to reach your goal! :-) Not at all! But I am concerned that just thinking that you "deserve" something is not enough to bring it to you! I am worried that too much thought of "well, I deserve this" is somewhat counterproductive and makes us all work a little less harder to achieve what we want!
To say the least, I have really mixed emotions about this! I would love to hear your opinion!
Love, light, and peace,
Mambo Samantha Corfield
